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Gender Identity & Politics

February 27, 2012
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I caught a snip of something on CNN Sunday morning.  I’m not sure of the conversation, only that a certain woman may have been called down because she viewed every issue via gender identity politics of being a lesbian.  It dawned on me that she was a very pathetic person, not because she was a lesbian (not that there’s anything wrong with that) but because she could only see the world that way.

As I have repeatedly stated, I no more care about a person’s proclivity than I do their color.  I don’t give a rip.  When a person must list their gender identity as who they are, is it possible they can’t come to grips with themselves?  I find amusing people’s twitter labels.  When I see someone, especially a man, who lists himself as heterosexual, my first thought is, okay, that guy has some ‘issues’.

Do you have any gay friends who use gender identity to identify themselves, politically?  I don’t.  My very dear gay friends don’t even vote.  They are the most apolitical people I know.  Then again they’ve been together for nearly 37 years.  Their dynamics are basically the same a a heterosexual couple who has been married that long.

It started me thinking about how people view themselves and political identity.  It’s rather like a woman who has a sole identity as a ‘mom’.  Isn’t there anything else in her life besides being a ‘mom’?  Sure, I am well aware it is time-consuming, all encompassing, and exhausting, but a woman should have more to her than ‘mom’.  My mother had a heck of a lot about her other than ‘mom’.  When I see women who consider that the only part of who they are, I see someone utterly miserable.

I’ve seen my sister transform herself from that all encompassing ‘mommy’ track, to exhausted  home schooling parent, to someone dealing with older off-spring and their problems.  I’ve watched her change from ‘mom’ to business woman, entrepreneur, to utterly harassed business owner with nearly 40 people on a payroll.

I use my sister as an example of how people change how they view themselves over the years.  Today’s mommy-track exhausted woman is tomorrow’s small business owner.   We evolve in how we see ourselves.  It is part of personal growth.  But, when a person can’t get past something like racial or gender identity politics, one begins to wonder if they can grow, as an individual.

How do you see your identity?  I started thinking about this, listing 20 things about me.  Try it, and see what happens.  Try to leave gender as in male/female out of it.  Think of who you really are.  I have listed them in order of what is important to me.

  1. Christian
  2. Writer
  3. Historian
  4. Expert in life of Wyatt Earp
  5. Expert in history of fashion
  6. Major science fascination (geology, astronomy, archaeology, paleontology)
  7. Republican
  8. Serious background in fine arts, literature, art, music, humanities
  9. Fanatic about manners, etiquette
  10. Expert in British history, medieval, post-Roman UK, Arthurian, Tudor
  11. Political
  12. Opera fanatic
  13. Very well organized – anal about it
  14. Photographer
  15. Consummate shopper
  16. Major league British background/family tree
  17. Girly
  18. Lover of baseball
  19. Collector (shoes, rocks, Louis Vuitton, pink depression glass, art, books, antiques, dust)
  20. Absolute bitch about proper dress, elimination of jeans, t-shirts, baseball caps, athletic shoes in daily life)

I surprised myself when making this list.  I stopped to think about what was important to me.  Funny  how the political was not near the top.  The only reason I used anything to identify me with gender is because I like “girly” things – pink, jewelry, shoes, handbags, shopping, don’t really care for sports.  I have friends who laugh at me because of it.  “Girly” isn’t really a gender thing.  My sister is as heterosexual as I am, but she rarely does “Girly” and the color “pink” makes her want to vomit.

When thinking about this, I don’t make an issue because I’m single, have no children, six cats and a dog.  I don’t even bother making an issue out of the fact that a good man is difficult to find. I realized I no longer even list “survivor of child abuse” as part of who I am.

While I was doing the list, I was adding a few things that were character traits, had to change that.  So, I thought about listing 20 character traits.

  1. Optimistic
  2. Pessimistic when it comes to people & human nature
  3. Total & complete skeptic of everybody and everything
  4. Cannot tolerate people who are arrogant or have a self-inflated sense of worth
  5. I detest “true” believers of any ilk who are closed minded and refuse to listen to reason.
  6. Curious
  7. Charitable – Can be a total soft touch
  8. Warped sense of humor
  9. Lazy
  10. Curious to the point of being obsessive at times
  11. Procrastinating
  12. Organized thought process
  13. Can be a total bitch, even when not necessary
  14. Usually give people too much benefit of doubt
  15. Avoid house cleaning like the plague
  16. Have no tolerance for unfairness, unfair people
  17. Don’t really give much of a rip about success or being “important”
  18. Avoid unpleasant situations and confrontations
  19. Self deprecating
  20. High personal standards for myself but expect others to have none

Once again, there is nothing on this list that identifies my gender other than the word “bitch”.   I could have said “can be a total jerk” but that doesn’t work.  As a person, I think I am well aware of my faults.

How on earth can a rational, well rounded individual with a half-way decent outlook on life base their entire system of who they are on being a specific gender, race, proclivity, marital status, having a specific career, or looking a certain way?  When this happens, I suspect, the person involved in such thinking is seriously in need of some therapy.  All of their thrusters are not firing correctly.

As for a single issue political agenda, get a life.

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